![]() ![]() With your fiddle in hand I asked you to play for me a tune. With no other by your side, I never meant to intrude. With the hopes that you might be pretending too. Sometimes I’ll pretend that I’m there with you, No money or gold it was the only currency I knew. ![]() In a small town somewhere all who I can think of is you. Im just smoking, writing bout myself, damn, I need yall. Im just smoking, thinking to myself, damn, I need yall. I come from the bottom, smokin top notch, you know Im choking. Oh I broke when I realized I was yet to fall asleep. Lil bro ran off with a Glock and weed, that lil boy know he bogus. The weight of the many tears she shed nearly woke me from my bad dream,Īnd I broke when I realized I was yet to fall asleep. The crack in my mother’s voice when he said he would not stayįed down into her tired heart, she did not want him to go away. I was met with the helplessness of being only 12 years old I surrendered to a silence that I could not hear before. Until now I’d never longed for that house down the road.Īs I faced the disappointment of my dug up kitchen floor, The house down the road, all gilded and old.ĭoe-eyed through the years I watched glad families come and go.īut never as glad as mine, or the home that we’d grown. Like a dram on a damn cold winters night. Now I’ve chased your love cause I thought it might feel woolen. The bars on my window didn’t leave me safe at night. Perhaps the fear of splitting open, showing some parts of yourself that you don’t even really want to know.Īnd I’ve been grieving since I left old Carolina. Some things they just like leaving, like people love and money and I don’t know what it’s all running from. Verse 1 Yeah, growing up, yeah Know a lot, but I dont know enough What you doin here Why you even showin up Yeah Showin up for tryna show me love Why you look confused like you dont. Now i’ve chased your love cause I thought it might feel woolen. My own hurting masks the way I feel about the world and all the little things I wish were differentĪnd I’ve been grieving since I left old Carolina. Maybe I just like hurting, building up walls and then ripping them down with my own disposition. I left the howling winds and the prairies to find some kind of idea, am I full or am I empty? The lights pouring through my window dressing everything all up in gold and I don’t know what I’m doing I was raised to turn the other cheek and now all I’m left with is my own shame. Why do you always get to be the child? Your mama brought you up that way. You act as if you got the best of me, but we both know your acting small. Like a little girl with wide eyes and curls I didn’t know it was just a game. I’ve watched the time melt on by now, dripping down on me again Why do you always get to be the child? We all want to play those foolish games. The rivers thawed but you’re still frozen, the words I write to you are still the same. It’s hard to watch you look away from me though I know I'm not to blame. In the notion of the disbelief that what will be will be. My name is something that my parents gave to me,īut lately I disassociate when it’s hollered out at me.Īnd I’ve been tangled up in the dichotomy, They might not see me for a while, for I’ve gone in a hurry. I often think I could hop on a plane and it all would go away,īut I'd be a fool to think my burdens are something I don't carry.įor I can’t leave them at the gate with the rest of my worries, Though I know there's nothing, nothing left for me there no more.Īt night I take to walking down lonely dead end roads I’ve been highballing through a playground zone For a long time I resisted, and I finally got one so I can pay my mortgage, and it helped me from becoming a homeless person.So I took to drinking with the hopes of getting lost.įor when you’re always losing it’s hard to see your wins, “I got told so many times I needed a manager. “There’s just a lot of stuff that really moves me, and I don’t know how to express it, and I just want to try to do the best I can and surround myself with good people who don’t invalidate me.”ħ. “I don’t come from money or an educated family background or any sort of supportive family life, so all of my choices are made on my own.”Ħ. That’s, I think, the one thing that’s changed: Growing older, I’m not ashamed to hear my voice.”ĥ. But one day, I’m going to be able to sing the way I sang when I was a little kid, completely open and free. “For me, the moment the mic is on and it’s rolling, it’s impossible to vocally relax for some reason. “Playing the guitar, you kind of lock into a rhythm and a groove, and then it relaxes me to make up lyrics and sing.”Ĥ. That’s why everyone from animals to humans loves music.”ģ. Because that’s what relaxes your subconscious. “Usually, I’ll just sit down at a piano or with a guitar, and I’ll just be relaxed and play music. “If your parents gave you fire to play with when you were two, you’d be standing in fire by the time you were an adult.”Ģ. ![]()
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